How I came into teaching mindfulness

In 1994, burnt-out and in chronic pain after a big work project, I signed myself up for a 10-day silent Vipassana Retreat. I had no idea what I was getting myself into. From 4:30am till 9pm, the instruction was to rest the attention in the body, aware of the constantly changing sensations, and – the really impossible part – with equanimity! Having to stay so up-close to body sensations that weren’t ‘as they should be’ was bad enough, but also coming up was wave after wave of grief. I’d had several traumatic losses, the most devastating being the sudden death of my seemingly fit and healthy 68-year-old dad. 

As the days of endless body-scanning wore on, I noticed that when I got side-tracked into stories of ‘this pain/problem shouldn’t be here,’ or ‘Dad shouldn’t have died,’ there was increased bodily tightness, corresponding with more pain. When I followed the instruction to ‘be with’ the sensations, without judging, resisting or trying to re-write the past, the pain lessened. Soon after, I realised I felt happier than I had been in years – that I had been depressed and that this had dissolved. When my beautiful mum died just one year later, also from an out-of-the-blue heart attack, this time I was able to catch when the grieving started morphing into depression, and booked myself back in for another retreat.

Having three beautiful daughters, put an end to retreats and regular practice, until coming across Jon Kabat-Zinn’s Full Catastrophe Living in the early 2000’s while working part-time as a hospital social worker in Oncology and Palliative Care. Despite the hunger for meditation, the medicos were sceptical, so it was a game-changer to discover Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction programs had been going since 1979, with strong results around increasing ease and well-being, and decreasing rates of depression and anxiety, regardless of prognosis and pain. I knew immediately that there was nothing more meaningful I could do than share this work. 

Background

• BA, B.Social Work
• Master in Arts (History) 
• Master in Relationship Therapy
• Accredited Mental Health Social Worker (member of the A.A.S.W.) 
• 35 years in private practice
• Teaching in University counselling programs
• MBSR, MSC, PNT, Daring Greatly (Brene Brown) Teacher
• Dharma teacher training (in progress)
• Many silent retreats over the years
• Experienced retreat facilitator having led many weekend and weeklong day retreats specialising in mindfulness, compassion and relationships.

Specialisation

I welcome diversity, and do my utmost to ensure each group feels as safe and supportive as possible. My personal story, including a rocky start to retreats and meditation, grief and loss, health issues, having three adult children etc. – helps me be authentic and compassionate about the various challenges that arise for people both on and off the stool. My decades of working in mental health, and specialisations in grief, trauma, and relationships, also means I feel very comfortable being with the toughest of emotions and experiences, and can embody how turning towards these with compassion and mindfulness, makes them more bearable, and prevents adding extra layers of stress or suffering.

Teaching Philosophy

I believe living and loving well take practice! We don’t get to control so much of what life deals out, but we can choose how we respond. For me, this is what mindfulness training is all about, and has the potential to benefit not just ourselves, but our wider circles and environment. As teacher, my role is to support each participant to find their own wise, kind and sustainable way with the practices, both on and off the stool. Tears and laughter are welcomed, and my style is warm, open, compassionate, encouraging and authentic.